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Eh – A World Without Art

Emily Semlow, Staff Writer

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Today, we gather to see…nothing.

A world once so beautiful is now out of place.

A world once so colorful, now bland.

We stand here, wherever you may be, to witness a step towards equality. In efforts to end conflict before destroying one another through social media, politics, and physical pain, the President has made the executive decision to bring us into a time where art is no longer acceptable, creating an environment that rids society of competition and over expression.

“The people should not be allowed to express themselves so much. It creates problems for us all when few reach for extremities, ruining the fun and taking our God-given right of speech away for all,” the President said.

Sadly, with this ruling comes the realization that art is in everything, including this article. For now, the President has only conducted the order for the military to raid houses for art supplies, some technology, and to replace clothing with government distributed clothing. Though, there is no telling how far these actions may go, depending upon the President’s definition of art and how many of our rights he’s willing to demolish.

“If the public can not contain and control themselves, it’s up to the government to do what’s best for them,” the President said.

The question:Is this all really worth it for attainable equality? Our society cannot be, and never will be, the same after this movement; voices will be stifled and emotions will be oppressed. The ideals behind humanity will be changed in exchange for the ideals of Communists, the one thing we always fought off.

No threats have been made for those who resist giving up their belongings, though it has been advised that people cooperate. Time can only tell what steps will be taken next, for the public and government.

 

“The Turnip” is a source of parody, satire, and humor and is for entertainment purposes only. Said posts or stories may or may not use real names, always in semi-real and/or mostly, or substantially, fictitious ways. Therefore, all news articles contained within “The Turnip” are works of fiction and constitute fake news. Any resemblance to the truth is purely coincidental, except for all references to politicians and/or celebrities, in which case they are based on real people, but still based almost entirely in fiction.

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Eh – A World Without Art