The Wigwam Name Change

Say Goodbye to the Wigwam!

Kate Carlin, Managing Editor

That is right ladies and gentlemen, don’t wet yourself in excitement.

The Wigwam is no longer The Wigwam. After a decade of stories, switching the Asparagus to the Turnip, two different newspaper teachers, and a bunch of random stories, this era is now coming to an end.

It has been a great honor to serve on The Wigwam for the past three years, and it just breaks my heart that this change was somehow imminent and honestly I am not that surprised but of course, I am disappointed.

Don’t cry, I know all seven of our readers are really upset about this. However, the name change will add some spice to The Wigwam image, and we are proud to announce that the new name for the Keller High School Wigwam is…

Zoo Wee Mama!

That is right folks! The Wigwam will now be named Zoo We Mama! Coming along with the name change is a change of editors; say goodbye to Hannah Webb, she smelled weird and actually studied anyway.

Our new Editor-in-Chief for Zoo Wee Mama! is none other than Dwayne “THE ROCK” Johnson!

His movie cameos and very unnecessary red carpet appearances capture the true essence of our loving newspaper staff! Very awkward on camera and just in general incredibly unnecessary! With our new addition to the Editor-in-Chief Position, Zoo Wee Mama! will bring in a fan base of twelve-year-old boys and way too comfortable teenage girls; what a switch up!

Bringing in a brand new Editor-in-Chief also means the addition of another brand new Managing Editor!

It has been an absolute pleasure being the beautiful and wonderful Managing Editor for The Wigwam, with many loud dance parties in the class, filled with dancing on tables and almost satirical anecdotes from my life. It is, however, sadly my time to leave. However, with how much I am gone in the first place and the fact that all I do is eat sandwiches and cry about my academic record, I don’t think anyone on the staff would even care to take notice of my absence.

Mixed in with the fact that being the Managing Editor is the “make sure nobody gets killed” job of the newspaper. I feel like I am the only one that poses a danger to ever killing anything (usually pencils and dreams of others), so with the removal of me from the staff along with bringing in Dwayne as the new Editor-in-Chief and the whole name change, I honestly feel like Zoo Wee Mama! will accomplish what The Wigwam never has.

Getting people to actually READ our editions!