Local Gym Exposed

Local Gym Exposed

The building sits on a popular road in the heart of Keller. It is a popular choice for swimming, going down dank slides, and for those of you who like getting #swole, pumping the iron. Middle school boys who look like Matty B are constantly playing basketball games, and lovely elderly people are usually there just chilling on the bikes.

Thought this place may seem harmless, it is actually a place of extreme mystery and scandal.

If you go behind the scenes and into the pool area, you will meet the sinister lifeguard staff. Plagued by screaming children, red floaties, and a doll that you have to give mouth to mouth, it’s no wonder why our life guarding friends are so done.

Meet Chase Eraser, a friendly lifeguard who has a lot to tell.

“First of all, we are constantly surrounded by other hostile workers, such as Biehl Of Fortune, previously mentioned in an unrelated series called ‘Behind the Screens.'”

These workers compete for coveted “head guard” positions with all the ruthlessness of the Hunger Games.

“This boy named Vladimir was dissing my head guard skills so we threw the fake drowning doll in the water to test him, and he didn’t even notice. So I guess he’s worse.”

Vladimir, Big Boy Bliss, Chase, Biehl of Fortune and their friends watch over the citizens of Keller as they splash around in the pool and do Jazzercise.

“The biggest myth about the pool is that the indoor water slide is fun. It’s not even that fun,” said one source on the condition of anonymity.