Thanksgiving Sacrifices

Emily Semlow, Staff Writer

Thanksgiving, the time of year to enjoy what you don’t have and loathe people that have what you do want. This being what Thanksgiving is known for, it also has its plethora of other unique traditions.

If you did not know already, Thanksgiving is actually a very dangerous holiday, if you’re the sacrifice that is.

You see the Turkey Gods are always at work this holiday, looking for a sacrifice to sustain them through the winter. Don’t believe me? Explain how our seasons can go from the horror of Halloween to the happy, joyfulness the following holiday season has to offer. It’s because the Gods are satisfied from the generosity of those who know of them.

Other than that, Thanksgiving is full of self loathing, helplessness among other traditions.

Personally, my favorite tradition is when the family goes out to the backyard, or at least what’s left of the family, and throws around the turkey skin. This combining the baking of the turkey and fun family games.

One tradition, possibly thought of as “different”, would be when my uncle Phil would take off his left shoe and throw it in the fryer when no one was looking with the turkey to “give it an extra salty flavor” he would put it. It enhanced the flavor and was fun to watch as he lost his marbles, if you know what I mean. Let’s just say he was the sacrifice next year.

Maybe that was just my family, but I honestly think this is something everyone should consider when cooking their turkey. You could even stuff it with old shoes if you wanted!

So say goodbye to your loved ones this Thanksgiving and cross your fingers and hope you aren’t next.