The Relationship Pedestal


Kate Nickols, Staff Writer

Not wanting to be in a relationship doesn’t make you a prude. Being a friend with benefits doesn’t make you promiscuous. Going on dates but not dating doesn’t make you indecisive. And having a regular relationship doesn’t make you better than these people.  

Relationships have noticeably become more important to people as the years passed by. But why exactly has this happened? There are many theories, but it is almost obvious that the proof is in the social media and Hollywood world. As more movies and more songs are released, more people rely on having a significant other. Boyfriend, girlfriend. Girlfriend, girlfriend. Boyfriend, boyfriend. However you phrase or put it, some people see it as a necessity to be in a relationship.

But with this small box for certain relationships, it doesn’t leave much wiggle room for anything different. We’re in a norm where if you aren’t dating with a certain label, it’s unacceptable.

Example one would be not dating at all. Some people are quick to judge with this scenario, claiming that the person is single because they can’t get anyone; this is usually unlikely to never true. As if that person couldn’t just be single by choice. Popular music these days has taught this generation that it’s not right to be single and happy; popular opinion has made it seem impossible. This basically brainwashes people into something they don’t want, thinking they need a partner to fit in. This is never the case and is bluntly immature. No one needs a partner to be worth something or be acceptable. Though some people want one, no one needs one. To the surprise of most, it is very possible to function being single.

Secondly, there’s the people who desire a relationship without the emotional attachment. Though high school is slightly early to have this type of this relationship, it’s not uncommon. As a teen, some are too emotionally compromised to have a real relationship with feelings and so on. If someone can’t deal with their own feelings, how can they be expected to also carry the weight of someone else’s? It can be stressful and overbearing. This- though most see differently- is not a shameful situation. What is shameful is for someone to shame someone for just doing what they can handle. It’s okay to want the companionship without the commitment of emotions. It is possible to have a healthy stable relationship, without the relationship.

Lastly, there’s dates without the ‘dating’. This usually makes a person seem indecisive or like they’re using people. Though this could be true, it’s normally blown out of proportion. In this relationship, people are usually just trying to not make a mistake. It’s better to be sure of who you’re with then to just jump into a relationship with someone you don’t really know. They’re not trying to hurt anyone, if anything, they’re just trying to make sure they don’t get hurt.

Just because a relationship doesn’t have a preferable label, it doesn’t make it wrong. What’s wrong is judging people for having them.